We have all [regrettably] done things we are not very proud of, but it's through these decisions that we learn how to move on and better ourselves. The most important thing we, as humans, can do is step back and assess the world and people around us. To learn how to prioritise the most important aspects in our life enhances our self understanding and importance. Our priorities are defined by the choices we make in life, it’s not something we write on a piece of paper, but it’s the things we execute in our daily behavior. In every moment we have the opportunity to make a conscious choice in the direction of our well-being. Dedicating ourselves to things of no importance only proves to be a waste of time and life, the things we regret as the end will be dismissing the most important parts of us. It is undeniably difficult to sort out the most important thing is your life considering so many things hold such high positions in our hearts. But the answer is simple;
You. It's you.
You are the most important thing in your life. You are your top priority, without being self-centred or concieted. But how is anyone expected to be happy unless they treat themselves with the upmost respect? . You are the only one that can truly allow yourself to be content. Without your mind, you could neither comprehend nor feel happiness. So in the end, it is you that can make yourself happy.
Limiting ourself is surprisingly not self deprived, but it's through the attitudes and opinions of others that we come to a conclusion about specific things, this parable I've heard teaches a important lesson on self limitations and goes like this;
As my friend passed by the elephants, he suddenly stopped, confused by the fact that these huge creatures were being held by only a rope tied to their legs. It was obvious that the elephants could, at any time, break free from the ropes they were tied to, but for some reason they did not. My friend saw the trainer nearby and asked why these beautiful, magnificent animals just stood there and made no attempt to escape.
“Well,” he said, “when they are very young and much smaller we use the same size rope to tie them and at that age it’s enough to hold them. As they grow up, they are conditioned to believe that they cannot break away. They believe the rope can still hold them, so they never try to break free.” My friend was amazed. These animals could at any time break free from their bonds but because they believed they couldn’t, they were stuck right where they were. The powerful and gigantic creature limited its present abilities by the limitations of its past. How many of us go through life believing the ropes tied to us?
Just like the elephant, we ourselves are conditioned to believe the opinions of people thus preventing us to fufill our truest potential. Limiting beliefs are born from rationalisations of previous painful experiences. They are designed to remove responsibility from ourselves. That way we’ll never hurt ourselves again by thinking we can change our situation. It’s not that the elephants believe they’re too weak, but it’s that the rope is too strong and consequently they believe there’s nothing they can do about it. The most unfortunate part of limiting beliefs is that our mind is formed to unconsciously find evidence which already supports our current beliefs. In psychology, this is called the Subjective validation bias. Once the belief is adopted, our mind goes on auto-pilot to continue reinforcing it. The sad thing is, many people conform to the expectations of people and society to the extent that they simply forget themselves. To lose a sense of oneself and become, like the elephant, stuck in a position wherein you are a puppet is the most unfortunate thing.
Ill leave you with this very insightful quote;
"Most of the shadows of life are caused by standing in our own sunshine" - Ralph Waldo Emerson
